LOVE'S QUANDARY
This artwork was painted as a reflection and personal conclusion to one of my hardest moments - an experience of heartbreak that felt foreign and unforgiving.
I moved from Australia to the UK to be with someone I believed I would spend my life with. In the beginning we shared the same vision for the future, including the possibility of having children. Over time however, this became less clear and the more I tried to gain clarity, the more elusive the answer became. This artwork came to be in the months that followed the separation with someone whose shared love felt infinite, while coming to terms with futures that no longer aligned.
Symbolism lies in the details of this painting in a much more considered way than I usually approach an artwork with. Within the layers is a self portrait - only half the face visible - to reflect two life paths, and whichever path chosen would be accompanied by loss. There is a referenced painting called “Charity" painted by Francesco de Rossi - a woman surrounded by three babes that I felt connected to when I saw it in the Uffizi museum in Florence. Within my work, the children are barely impressions, as if they linger waiting for my acceptance. There are also flowers from a photograph I took at Highgate cemetery, a symbol of the death of something loved, cherished and ultimately laid to rest.
Within loss there lies the seed of something new. A new chapter, a fresh beginning. And this is often accompanied by the weight of something being lifted, which in the painting is represented by the swirling voided space on the top half of the work. I have learned that my personal truth is available in the moment, not the future. And this can be accessed simply by introspection - something deeply aligned with my own spiritual journey. For me, this painting serves as a symbol of the alchemised beauty we can find in challenging moments, and through loss comes the birth of something new.